Valentine’s Cocktails: The Good, The Bad, and The Coma-Inducing

Much like the red, green and overly pepperminted cocktails of the Christmas season, the Valentine’s season provides an excuse for bars and restaurants to force us to shell out $12 for a wide variety of terrible drinks that are given cutesy names and extreme levels of sugar.  Restaurants know that they can shame people (mostly men) into paying for diabetes-accelerating potions spiked with grenadine, PAMA pomegranate liqueur and the Raspberry flavored Chambord.  These ingredients serve no purpose other than to turn it red and add about 200 calories of pure sugar to the drink.  These drinks are always advertised as something sickly cute like “Valentini” or “Lover’s Kiss” or “Snuggle Cup.”  Ugh…

“But they’re sweet and red… for VALENTINES!!” you say.

No.

Just no.

*rolls up newspaper and smacks you on the nose*

Bad drinker.  Don’t pay for that crap any more!!

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While the title of this post might trick you into thinking that I will give you recipes for drinks like the sugar-rimmed monstrosity pictured here, I don’t EVER want to encourage this kind of irresponsible bartending.  It’s a crime to charge $15 for a a coupe glass filled with strawberry topping, sugar and bottom shelf vodka (you can’t taste it over the sugar anyway!).  It’s a travesty… and I will never distribute the recipes to these Frankenstein’s monster “cocktails.”

But what should I drink on Valentine’s Day?

Well, there are so many options for alcoholic additions to your sexy night…

If you’re in the mood for something sweeter, I’d go with a delicious drink that has, unfortunately been relegated to hipster brunch places on Capitol Hill.

Bellini

1 part Peach Puree

2 parts Champagne

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Fresh peach is great for this drink and adds a sweet, sexy, silky feeling when mixed with good Champagne.  It’s sweet, but a little tart, and the bubbles add a nice depth to the drink.

A note to my macho male readers… this drink was 1) created by an Italian man, 2) served first in Harry’s bar in Venice, 3) enjoyed by such manly men as Andy Musson, Ernest Hemingway and Sinclair Lewis and 4) does not mean that you are any less of a man.  If you are uncomfortable being seen in a bar with a slightly pink drink served in a champagne flute, you’ve got bigger problems.  Real men drink champagne. Make this drink for your partner, or just order a round at a bar, and see what happens next.  *bow chicha bow wow*

But I REALLY want my drink to be red, it is Valentine’s Day after all…

If you want something red, because you need to see the color red to get in that special Valentine’s mood… all of these options are great!

The Negroni (equal parts Gin, Campari, and Sweet Vermouth)

The Boulevardier (1.5 parts bourbon, 1 part Campari, 1 part Sweet Vermouth)

Vodka & Cranberry (umm… vodka… and cranberry juice)

Red wine (share a bottle with your partner!)

But I’m alone/single/anti-establishment… what do I do tonight?

Go to Canon.  It’s one of the best bars in the United States and it’s holding a truly unique celebration on February 14th.  What could be better than a great cocktail and a squirt gun to express your anti-couple rage?  Details below…

Cheers!

Snowed In? Here, Have a Drink…

Well, it happened.  Snow fell by the centimeter in the Seattle area and, predictably, everyone freaked out.  If you want my advice, which I assume you always do, the first thing you should do is go build a snowman or have a snowball fight with the neighborhood kids.  Enjoy the snow while it lasts.  After you’ve had your fun and pummeled the neighbor’s twelve year old with a snowball attack that could take down an adult grizzly bear, you should treat yourself to a nice warm drink… here are three great suggestions for a cold winter’s night.

Blood Orange Hot Toddy

Blood Orange Hot Toddy

10 oz Blood Orange Rachel’s Ginger Beer

2oz Bourbon

Star anise and clove garnish

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Heat the ginger beer in a tea kettle pour into a heatproof mug, add whiskey and garnishes to taste.  It’s delicious but, full disclosure, I’ve yet to make to make this one at home (hence the bad photo at the RGB bar in Pike Place).

The Bourbon Furnace

The Bourbon Furnace

5oz hot apple cider

1.5oz Bourbon

0.5oz Allspice Dram

Apple slice (garnish)

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Combine ingredients in a heatproof mug, sip, enjoy, relax.  Be warm.  See my Cocktail Christmas write up on this delicious drink here.

Never Dry Hot Toddy

4oz Hot Water

2oz Goslings Black Seal Rum

0.5oz Allspice Dram

0.5oz Simple Syrup

2 dashes Angostura Bitters

Lemon wheel studded with cloves

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The photo on the right is not my hot toddy.  It’s a fantasy of what this drink should look like.  The Never Dry Hot Toddy is not photogenic, in fact it comes out looking like dark black tea, but it is damn good. Like, really good.

It’s by far the best iteration of a hot toddy that I have ever even heard of.  That’s right, it’s the real deal.  I’m proud enough of this drink to put my name on it and send it out in batches to my friends.  It’s not only a great drink, it’s  a miracle cure.  It will get rid of your flu or cold.  It might even have other magic properties to it that haven’t been discovered yet.  Get on that.

Anyway, I hope you try these three great winter drinks and enjoy them on a cold day like today…preferably by the fire.  Even if that fire is an app on your iPhone.

Cheers!

Cocktail Christmas Day 21: The Eagle Rare 10 Lords a’ Leaping

What on earth was the person in The 12 Days of Christmas going to do with the 10 lords a’ leaping?  Do they continuously leap?  If so, I bet they A) have pretty massive quads and B) get thirsty pretty quickly.  Today’s drink is a solid choice for a Lord or Lady with a strong post-leap thirst.

The Eagle Rare 10 Lords a’ Leaping is a unique combination of bourbon, bitters, spice, and lime juice.  The citrus and spice make me a very happy drinker!  Here’s how it’s done…

The Eagle Rare 10 Lords a’ Leaping

2oz Eagle Rare 10 year bourbon

0.5oz fresh lime juice

0.5oz honey syrup

.25oz Allspice Dram

5 dashes Angostura bitters

Combine ingredients over ice, shake or stir and strain into a chilled cocktail glass.

The drink isn’t something extremely special but it is a very nice drink that adds an element of holiday cheer to a simple drink.  The Eagle Rare 10 year bourbon is very nice and I normally wouldn’t mix it into a cocktail other than a Manhattan or something similar.  Eagle Rare is a very strongly flavored bourbon with many levels and a powerful punch towards the finish.  It was a hit at the Bourbon tasting I had late last month.  Adding so many other powerful ingredients can overpower a lesser bourbon but the Eagle Rare stands up to the Allspice and bitters quite well.

The honey syrup is simple to make.  Mix equal parts hot water and honey together and let it cool.  It’s just like watered down honey but it mixes well into drinks and gives it a nice clover honey flavor.

Really, this drink could be made with any aged spirit.  The original recipe calls for Scotch (I didn’t have a 10 year scotch and still wanted to make the joke) but I think a good rum or even tequila could work well.  Give it a try and let me know what works.

Cheers!